Category: Life

January 5, 2011

On The Love And Loss Of Friends

The holiday season is a trying time for most of us, for a whole variety of reasons. This year, many former coworkers of mine and friends had to deal with the suicide of Jon Vance, a guy that was as intelligent as he was sociable, and one who I never would have thought was capable of such a thing. That was back on November 23rd of 2010, and I’ve found myself thinking about him every day since. I think part of it is because I haven’t had the closure of a funeral, or even seeing a grave, I experienced all the tragedy with none of the healing that comes with moving on.

Even hearing that guilt is a normal mechanism for suicide survivors, it makes the burden no less onerous. The argument with myself is that I should’ve spoken to him more, let him know he had friends and we really do care and want to see him do well, and not hurt. The placating counterargument is that I’m all the way out here, and he’s so far away, how much would it have meant? How much good would it have done? It’s the pain of never having an answer to that, no matter what and no matter how much you want one. Justifiably or not, I think a lot of us share a sense of guilt.

I have had closer deaths to me, my mother nearly six years ago and my grandfather around the age of 9. But I’ve never had to deal with someone I know taking their own life. Why does it feel so different? I did have plenty of time to prepare for losing Mom, after two near-death scares and seeing her the night before she died, I knew exactly what the call was at 4:45 … (More) “On The Love And Loss Of Friends”

Life Music

December 13, 2010

Audio Infinitum (Or, Five Songs Forever)

Music lovers know exactly what someone means when they say “I love the song, but I can’t listen to it all that often,” or something to that effect. Then there are comfort songs, songs to listen to when you’re happy, pissed off, maybe even drunk. (I’m not here to judge.) But what about a song to listen to forever?

It’s funny, this is actually a project I do inadvertently when I make compilation CDs to put in the car, or playlists to listen to on repeat. There will inevitably be weaker songs that I’ll grow tired of well before others. So I’ll tweak the selections, and try to come up with that perfect playlist to represent a genre. I know myself well enough to say I could listen to these five songs, on repeat, more or less perpetually, in this order.

BT – Dark Heart Dawning

Dark Heart Dawning is a relative sleeper track of BT’s, it never appeared on a single or EP after being released on the album Emotional Technology in 2003. While I have other favorites off the album (P A R I S and The Last Moment Of Clarity in particular) none of them exhibit the understated beauty of Dark Heart Dawning. Downtempo pedal steel guitar and a simple story segue into a powerful second half with a heavy gospel overtone. That’s off-putting to some, but I love the emotion you find in a song like this. Deep down I hope BT likes this one as much as I do.

Stevie Ray Vaughan – Riviera Paradise

I became a fan of SRV not long after I started playing the guitar, probably around age 14. I had a copy of Couldn’t Stand The Weather that I still think is one of the most complete displays of skill … (More) “Audio Infinitum (Or, Five Songs Forever)”

Blogging General Life Work

August 31, 2010

Remembering August

Rumors of my demise are greatly exaggerated.

This month has been the best, busiest and most life-changing month I’ve ever experienced. Let me bring you up to speed.

Back in early August, Diana and I moved in together, which involved moving out of our respective cities and into a new town. We knew where we wanted to be, but even now as I sit here, looking out the window to see the sunset casting the Sandia Mountains red, it’s hard to believe that the hard work and determination paid off and we’re really here: Albuquerque, New Mexico.

The drive out here was an experience in itself, the first day was a long drive much like any other I’ve been on. The second, however, took us through the wind farms and hills of Western Oklahoma, the stark, desolate panhandle of Texas, devoid of life save for Amarillo, which seems to pop up from nothing and leaves you back on God’s definition of the flatlands just as quickly. After Texas was two hundred miles of New Mexico, and it included the most breathtaking driving of my life, through canyons and overlooking mesas and mountain ridges in the distance that evoked a thought I’d never had before, the thought that the landscape of where you call home could truly make you happy or sad, and maybe people are happier out here just because they get little flashes of the truly awesome in their day-to-day life. The fact that Diana and I still find breathtaking new views seemingly every week is confirmation in itself that we picked the right home, and in many ways I feel like I was always meant to end up here.

After moving quickly came work, four days after moving to a town where we knew nobody and had nary … (More) “Remembering August”

Blogging DanielTharp.com Life

May 22, 2009

Not dead. Not, in fact, deceased.

I’m alive, and in fact have been writing all this time, albeit in smaller, 140-character chunks on my Twitter account. So what happened after that fateful evening of March 15th? Well, an hour or two after writing that, I sent a message to a member on Basenotes named exquisitely_me, and the message said…

“What’s new with you? :)”

The conversation’s been going on for over two months since then, and I’ve discovered some new things, namely that I love this girl named exquisitely_me and she loves me back. The gossip was a-flyin’ when Facebook had the hot scoop around the end of March, it was the first to report that…

“Daniel is in a relationship with Diana Kotyk.”

I fell completely off the map for about eleven days starting back on the 9th of this month, the last bit of communication being a tweet that said…

“Diana is going to be in my arms in five minutes tops!”

I did manage to get off one little blurb during that time, that read…

“I am having, without reservation, the best week of my life.”

My perfume reviews have been on pen and paper, shoulder to shoulder with Diana, over a vial of fragrance, or perhaps a verbal review (also known as an ‘opinion’), soft words of like or dislike, learning, exploring, and expanding knowledge of the art. She’s encouraged me to get back into writing, though, so I trade comfortable seclusion for another round of writing for the masses.

In love. That’s where I’ve been, and in fact it’s the locale I write from even now, dear reader.… (More) “Not dead. Not, in fact, deceased.”

DanielTharp.com Life

September 13, 2008

Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere…

Alright I got about halfway done with the cleanup that I wanted to accomplish. The fragrance reviews are now all organized down the sidebar, and placeholders have been set for forthcoming reviews in both Niche Experiment One and the Bond No. 9 Marathon. Still to be done is a comprehensive set of tags, which will serve double duty for another forthcoming project. And of course I still have to write the reviews, I’ve still got 45 to be written just to get caught up, never mind the other little samples and the like I have that I wouldn’t mind sampling. The truth is a lot of them won’t be that bad as they’re ones I already have strong opinions on (Dirty English and Platinum Egoiste should be written very quickly for instance). All in all I’m okay with the stuff I accomplished on here today, slightly less so with my accomplishments here at home. Still a lot of stuff to be done (cleaning, chores etc.), and I’m hoping I can get it done tonight and tomorrow night.

EDIT: Ooh, also, my bottle of Palisander arrived today! It’s pretty damn tiny for a 75mL bottle. D: I’ll take their word for it though. Also the 2.5mL atomizers got here today, thanks Sally at Accessories for Fragrances. If you ever need decanting supplies she’s very highly recommended by not just me but many of the Basenotes crew.… (More) “Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere…”

DanielTharp.com Life

September 11, 2008

Updates for 9/12

Well life’s weird. Starting Monday, ready or not, I’m working two jobs that stretch basically from 8 AM to 10 PM. The second job (working for a domain registrar) will look damn good on a resumÃ©, nevermind the catch (the domain registrar is my landlord and I’m working from home). This means a lot to me, making all of this work. If I can do it, I may just be able to handle this “real life” thing. Of course that’s not terribly fair to myself, I’ve been doing alright before this, making the rent and whatnot. But there’s a lot of bills I’m still not paying, my dad’s doing a lot of it (car, car insurance, and phone namely). The car I could manage, the phone I could probably go prepaid on (though it would kill me), insurance I could probably cheap out on. So theoretically I could manage just fine.

What does this mean for the blog? Not much, the delay in content has less to do with real life and more to do with the fact that I’m waiting on some atomizers to get here so I can transfer the new Bond samples into spray bottles instead of vials. I also have some content to come for the website proper, which sadly you guys won’t be able to see as it’s for private use. :P

The re-design and WordPress upgrade are on hold while I look into some possible compatibility bugs, my comment spam eater (the amazing Spam Karma 2) averages 10 to 20 blocked comments daily and I don’t really want to lose that protection for an upgrade that extends me personally no extra functionality.

So there’s your status for the moment. Monday begins another chapter in my life, I should also have the atomizers by then … (More) “Updates for 9/12”

Life Work

August 29, 2008

The Prophet Ice Cube

Today was a good day.

Okay no that’s all I’ve got in relation to Ice Cube. Today just went about as well as I could ever hope for a day to go. Woke up with no pain or stiffness in my ankle, got out of bed refreshed and sat in front of the new 32″ monitor (the computer hasn’t acted up in almost a week now), some Brian Eno playing as the creative juices stirred and I found myself completely caught up on my reviewing. Well, so I say, I’ve still got a bit over 30 reviews to go but I’m caught up in the niche experiment.

I’ve been in the process of trying to move up within the Office Depot company; it’s been unsuccessful but not for lack of effort. I’m currently in what’s considered a Level 1 position, and the next step up is (surprise) Level 2. One of the major conditions for working at the store I’m at currently is that I would be able to be promoted to this Level 2 position fairly quickly. Sure enough, about a month into my tenure there a spot opened up. I was told, yup, we’re all set, just gotta key you in for it. Fast forward to a week later. Nothing. Fast forward. Nothing, it never happened. The position simply isn’t there now, they chose not to fill it at all.

That wouldn’t have bothered me too much except that I was continually being led to believe that I was getting this position. If you’re not gonna do it, tell me you’re not gonna do it. Combine that with the fact that the manager in question is not what I consider a model leader (I’m wording this carefully), and it becomes pretty clear what my course of action was … (More) “The Prophet Ice Cube”

Life

June 27, 2008